Valentine’s Day

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As previously mentioned, Ben and I don’t “do” Valentine’s Day. However, I know that’s not the norm, so I thought I’d write about something pertaining to relationships today – marriage in particular.

And, I thought I’d write something that may be a little controversial. You know, because I’m snarky that way.

So, let’s talk bank accounts.

I believe it’s important for married couples to have a joint bank account.

Why?

Because I believe that maintaining separate bank accounts is actually a manifestation of a much bigger issue: a lack of trust in the marriage.

It’s like saying, “Hey, I want to move in with you and enjoy all the perks of being married, but keep your hands off my money. I’m not entirely sure you won’t clean it out and leave me high and dry.”

So you divide up the bills like roommates do.

That’s okay…if all you want out of marriage is a roommate.

I guess my point is, if you don’t have trust in your marriage, then you don’t have much of a marriage. Relationships are built on a foundation of trust.

Do you trust your spouse or don’t you? If you do, then why not allow them access to every part of your life? If you don’t, you need to figure out why, and if you want your marriage to work and not end in divorce, then you need to get outside help. There’s no shame in it. If you’re stuck on a huge project at work, you ask for help, don’t you? You don’t just quit working on it and let your boss down, right? Marriage is so much more intricate than any work project. Why do we just expect things to magically work themselves out between spouses?

Marriages take a lot of work. It’s really hard, but if you’re willing to do it, it’s also really fulfilling. If you think your marriage suffers from a lack of trust, then find a counselor you both feel comfortable with, and work it out. It’s worth it.